Understanding school stress

We all hope our children will be enthusiastic about learning, enjoy going to school, and build confidence in their abilities. Sadly, for many young people in the UK today, this is not the reality, as their school years are increasingly overshadowed by pressure. Since the reformed exam courses were introduced in 2016, there has been a steady decline in the mental health of our teenagers. The combination of high-stakes exams, constant comparison, and the pervasive influence of social media has created an environment where stress and anxiety seem to be unavoidable parts of daily life.

GCSE and A-Level exams have always been important but in recent years, there has been an increasing perception of exam performance as "all or nothing." Young people are frequently reminded that these results will determine their futures, and the pressure to excel is enormous, particularly given the uncertainty of employment prospects and the influence of AI on the job market.

Our education system also places a huge emphasis on exam results as the main marker of success. While academic achievement is important, this focus often comes at the expense of creativity and other valuable skills such as emotional intelligence and resilience. Many students begin to equate their self-worth with the academic grades they achieve, which can leave them feeling deflated if their marks don’t match expectations. Since it is built into our examination system that only a certain % of pupils can achieve the highest grades, the system risks reinforcing the belief that only the very highest grades equal success. For many young people achieving a Grace 4 at GCSE or a Grade D at A-Level is a hugs accomplishment that should be celebrated, but these grades can feel devalued when the focus is on 8s and 9s, A’s and A*’s.  Knowing they won’t hit the top grades, some young people withdraw effort in subjects they don’t “excel” in, instead of valuing learning for its own sake. This can undermine confidence and resilience — key parts of the “5Cs” of academic buoyancy.

Over the past decade, students and teachers have had to adapt to more content-heavy courses, fewer opportunities for coursework, and exams that test memory and stamina as much as understanding. For students, this can feel overwhelming and confusing. Of course today’s teenagers are also growing up with social media where platforms often encourage academic comparisons with students around the country — “Who revised how many hours?” “Who’s predicted top grades?” — and this can intensify feelings of inadequacy, pressure and stress. 

So what can parents do? 

1. Normalise setbacks – remind your child that one exam or one grade doesn’t define their potential.

2. Focus on effort, not just outcomes – celebrate persistence, resilience, and progress.

3. Encourage balance – make sure young people have time for hobbies, rest and social time with friends.

4. Model healthy habits – let them see you taking breaks, managing stress, and keeping perspective during stressful periods of your own life.

5. Keep communication open – make home a safe place where they can talk honestly about their worries.